first

the latest song to hit my heart is FIRST, by brian doerksen. here's the chorus:

so we love to give because You gave so much

we live to love because You first loved us

i love those truths. i'm so thankful that God has shown me His kind of love - unconditional acceptance, embracing desire, unlimited encouragement, and yes, even pointed correction. and His kind of love loves first, unbelievable since i'm so unworthy of His attention. and His standard gives me an example to live, love and give away in my own life. no, not always easy, but it's what i'm called to... to me and then through me.  maybe the idea of cupid carrying an arrow isn't just romance.  love is meant to hit the heart.  and God is the grand initiator. i think it's really the Holy Spirit who carries a quiver full of arrows.  

the thought of Jesus' sacrifice on the cross really proves it all.  the Bible says, while we were yet sinners, He showed His kind of love...  now that's a FIRST.  and probably ONLY... yes, i'm thankful. and speechless...

a new communion

a few weeks ago, we went to a brian doerksen concert as part of his level ground tour. he decided to do this tour a little different, keeping the musicians off the stage, and using the center under the spotlights for stories of grace. we heard two local stories that night, but on his level ground DVD, there's another nine. what is it that stirs within, when people testify how Jesus has brought change in their lives?

questions:  why would anyone hold dear a powerless religion? what comfort is there living within rules someone else enforces? what's the purpose of a private faith? who are we helping when we keep grace in a box?  but then... what is it about Jesus'  love that has the power to do radical things?

perhaps these words, found on the wall in a concentration camp in germany may give evidence to a comfort found deep within the human heart, put there only by a God whose love and power are real. beyond belief:

 i believe in the sun even if isn't shining.

i believe in love even when i am alone.

i believe in God even when He is silent.

caught in the overflow. carried in the overflow. stories of grace are written in the overflow. stories of grace bring comfort, power, love, change, hope, life to the tellers and the hearers. and that's a communion like no other. faith-builder stories. it's like sharing glory.  

devotion

so at work this morning, a hillsong song rang anew in my heart.  lyrics that spoke my thoughts, as though i wrote them myself...

i search for You God of strength, i bow to You in my brokenness
and no other King could have so humbly come
to save my soul and heal my heart
i have nothing more than all You offer me, 

there is nothing else that’s of worth to me
and i love You Lord, You rescued me
You are all that i want, You’re all that i need
i pray to You God of peace, i rest in You my cares released...

in Your freedom I will live, in Your freedom I will live

i offer devotion, i offer devotion...

devotion.  what is it?  a noun or a verb?  a thing or a lifestyle? 

what does it feel like to me?  what does it look like to others?

and what does it do to God?  i'll bet my life it pleases Him.

maybe that's it...

 

enjoflectful

it's been a wonderful day.  basking in the enjoyment and reflection of our 30th wedding anniversary celebration yesterday, and being surrounded by so many people that God has given us to journey this road of life with.  basking in the enjoyment and reflection of leading worship this morning at a gathering of believers, alongside both those God has brought into my life to "band" with (except for rob who was ill) and 3 of "our" children who love Him and worship Him with their lives too.  and basking in the enjoyment and reflection of both witnessing a little child being dedicated to God by his parents and communing with bread and cup during the Lord's Supper this morning.  feeling "the current" has held me in it's sway for the last several months!  is there such a word as "enjoflectful?"  well there should be.  because it describes totally what's going on in my spirit... enjoying.  reflecting.  thankful. 

working on holiday? nope, i don't call this work.

today was a farm work day for us, despite most of the country enjoying a holiday.  but i don't mind.  for i often get to spend the day with my kids, doing something i enjoy, and between some conversation, just worship the day away together.  today it was hillsong united on the ipod, and songs like "God be the solution" and "all day" with their rhythms dictated the beat of grading peppers.  during other songs like "soon and very soon," and the infamous 12-minute "Saviour King," it was all i could do to keep my hands moving peppers from crate to box, instead of lifting them up...  i have often told my kids when thinking about their choice of vocation to find out what they love to do, and then get paid for it!  well, today i'm realizing my own advice is exactly what i'm following ~ i get to worship all day long and "get paid" to do it!  but just a warning.  if you happen to stop by the packbarn some day, more than likely, you'll "catch us in the overflow..."  :)

full on and in flow

the last several weeks have been a series of the most continuous demands of time, tests of faith, strains of perseverance, importance of details, stubborn obstacles and relentless prayers.  last weekend was a series of blessing, adventure, joy, worship, service, appreciation, pampering, good food, romance, and God's provision.  through all of it, i've known God's hand on my heart, His protection at my back, His forgiveness in my stumbling, His lead in my seeking, His strength in my exhaustion and His 'crazy' love catching me in His overflow - His surrounding, relentless, right-where-i-need-to-know-it care!  so i'm at rest and still, in this moment, feeling the waters of His grace over me, the swirl of His peace around me, and i'm marvelling and thankful for His strength in what has been.  sigh...

what happened you ask?  a snake in our basement, tractortrailer stuck in our lawn, awful windstorm that flattened trees, broke greenhouse glass, left us with no water and no power for 4 days, car trouble, carpenter ant fumigation in the house, little sleep, intense planning for a town-wide multi-church love-o-community day followed by a local friday-evening concert by a favourite christian band, an amazing wbis saturday, and a 30th wedding anniversary tailored-by-our-kids celebration adventure sunday that spoiled us beyond our imagination...

just feeling so humbly blessed by trusting God in the yuck stuff, totally emptying myself for Him in serving with-hands-and-feet worship, and then having His hand restore, refresh, renew right after... who said this deep and constant closeness and nearness to God (calling it a spiritual high really isn't fair) can't be the everyday...

Jesus, You are all to us...

let the glory of Your name be the passion of the church

let the righteousness of God be the holy flame that burns

let the saving love of Christ be the measure of our lives

we believe You're all to us...

sigh again...

this is Jesus in His glory

so it's easter weekend.  yesterday i spent most of the day in and out of an amazing lent devotional "making the passion personal."  here's a few thoughts:
* come now my soul, and worship this man, this God.  come believer, and behold your Saviour.  come to the innermost circle of all sanctity , the circle that contains the cross of Christ.  and here sit down.
* what can He say?  what words can change the evil in the hearts of men who glory in His humiliation?  what can He do?  come down from the cross and command them to bow and give Him His rightful place?  how well He understands that if He did, the price for sin would remain on their heads, a price none of them can ever hope to pay.
* like a roar, the scorn at Golgotha reaches the portals of heaven.  myriads of angels mourn, each one yearning to jerk the stakes from Jesus' hands and feet.  but the love of God is a mystery into which angels can only long to look.  the Saviour of the world will not save Himself and let mankind be damned to the hopelessness of hell.
* and the Light of the Word is extinguished for a few hours on a hill called Calvary.  men, who love darkness rather than light, demand a sign.  God gives them a sky that matches the blackness of their own hearts.
* Father God, how rarely have i thought of Your pain, in watching Your Son die as He did.  But You were there.  You watched, and You wept, and You did nothing.  i rest in my unworthiness of such love, and ponder Your mercy, flowing down, for one such as me.

see His love

see His love nailed onto a cross
perfect and blameless life given as sacrifice
see Him there all in the name of love
broken yet glorious, all for the sake of us
this is Jesus in His glory, King of Heaven dying for me
it is finished, He has done it, death is beaten, heaven beckons me
greater love no one could ever show
mercy so undeserved, freedom I should not know
all my sin, all of my hidden shamed

died with Him on the cross, eternity won for us
such love, such love, such love is this for me...

so here i sit, even still, in the circle of sanctity, unbelievable love.
the cross of Jesus above me.  and i'm caught in the overflow yet again...